In the year 3000, scientists decided that three millennia was more than enough time to wait for the second coming of the messiah. As such, it was time to take things into their own hands and speed the process up a bit. After the secret meaning behind Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade was decoded in the year 2967 and the Holy Grail was finally … Continue reading THE SECOND COMING
I remember Toy Story on Ice. I remember the dollar store, and games on floppy disk, and toy guns that broke within the day. I remember accidents. I remember warheads, and Pokémon trades, and pizza lunchables. I remember Doom. I remember snow days, and Wolverine’s blades, and hot wheels cars that went vroom. I remember recess. I remember box tops, and baby bottle pops, and … Continue reading I REMEMBER
Sam Jackson stood patiently in the clinically oppressive elevator, his livelihood about to be decided by what someone else thought of his life experience boiled down to a sheet of paper. He wondered how long it would take to be brought up. It. The elephant in the room. His name. Sam practiced his laugh in the mirror, hoping beyond hope that his disdain wouldn’t come … Continue reading THE INTERVIEW
Dexter couldn’t get out of bed. He knew in reality that it was more like he really, really didn’t want to get out of bed, but it felt more like an impossibility. If he were to quantify his current motivation on a scale of 1-10, he’d probably give himself a solid 1.5. But now that Dexter thought about it, was he being generous with that … Continue reading INTERNET BE DAMNED
